If you read much English-language Vietnamese news online, you'll often read this conclusion and chuckle silently: "Police are investigating."

These are crime stories and you may imagine to yourself that police are investigating, how they're looking for clues (cue CSI: Saigon), and at what point they conclude their investigation conclusively. (There are far fewer followups in the papers.)

There's a new Tumblr about this phenomena of police investigating things. A sample:

[Sorry, the link went down.]

Police are investigating all sorts of claims. Even children's arithmetic puzzles.

Seriously, every quote from the police: "we are investigating". Here is a bunch of random samples from recent news articles at Tuoi Tre:

Justice official overspeeds, threatens traffic police. Police are investigating.

A decomposing male body was found under a manhole inside the Thao Nguyen Xanh Restaurant in Ho Chi Minh City’s Binh Chanh District last Saturday when neighbors smelled a bad odor. Preliminary investigations found that the victim could be robbed and killed. Police are investigating.

Headless body of young girl found on Saigon River. The body is decomposing. Police are investigating.

At 7am Wednesday, a bus overturned while traveling on the National Highway 1A through Thanh Hoa province’s Tinh Gia district, injuring 30 passengers. The bus was traveling on the North-South route when it met two children walking in the opposite direction. Police are investigating.

Mother killed, son injured on way to take exam: The mother who was said to be taking her son on motorbike to school to take a college entrance examination was hit by a trailer tractor coming from a different lane. Police are investigating.

Four houses were destroyed in a morning fire in Ho Chi Minh City’s Tan Phu district today, leaving many people homeless... However, police said no one was killed or injured. Police are investigating.

A truck driver who admitted to nodding off at the wheel crashed into a motorcycle on National Highway 1A in the northern province of Ha Tinh early this morning, killing an old man and severely injuring his grandson. Preliminary investigations found that Khu Hoang Long, the driver, hit some traffic cones before hitting the motorbike coming in the opposite lane. Police are investigating.

Chemical explosion kills one at Deawoo Vietnam: Authorities said the victim could have been smoking when he opened the tank and a cigarette end could have fallen into the liquid. Smoking is banned at the site. Police are investigating.

Kien Giang family committed suicide by fire: A couple and their 3-year-old daughter in the southern province of Kien Giang were killed in what might have been a suicide by fire early Saturday morning. Police are investigating.

Finnish couple jumped to death in HCMC. Police are investigating.

39 motorbikes burnt to bones after truck fire... Police are investigating.

A woman’s body without a head and two arms was found Friday noon at an isolated land lot in the northern city of Hai Phong. She was totally naked except for a pair of underpants. Curiosity seekers flocked to the scene, causing a huge traffic jam in the area. Police are investigating.

I feel that on top of investigating things the police should also work on preventing traffic deaths from large vehicles, apparent mass suicides, fire hazards, and bodies from going headless.